Shopping therapy is good for the soul

This was a dismal weekend.

No, I’m not back to being my old sad-sack self again… it was just… dreary. Rainy, cloudy, gloomy, blah. Dismal.

It was so crummy this weekend that they canceled the yearly Air and Water Show in Chicago on Sunday. And that NEVER happens. Unless, of course, it rains so much that the ground turns into quicksand… which isn’t too far from the truth this weekend.

Anyway, I spent most of Saturday holed up in my apartment because it just didn’t make sense to do much else. I thought about doing some laundry, but changed my mind about that because the sidewalk from my back staircase to the basement has been broken up since early July, awaiting paving, and it was nothing but a rocky, muddy river this weekend. I wasn’t in the mood to navigate that mess.

So when Sunday rolled around, and I woke up with yet another sore back from my squishy, saggy 20-year-old mattress, I decided it was time to partake in some Shopping Therapy.

I knew I had some extra money in my possession and I thought to myself what I should do with it. Of course, the obvious thing would be to save it, but I came up with a list of possibilities anyway, and they were as follows:

1. I don’t need a computer. I have a computer. It works fine.

2. I don’t need a camera. I WANT a new camera, but the one I have works fine.

3. I don’t need a TV. I have a good TV, and it works fine.

4. I don’t need an iPod or any other type of fun toy. I have an iPod and it works fine.

5. I need to do some work on my car, but the work that I need to do won’t cost me all that much.

6. I NEED a new bed.

It was amazingly easy to narrow down the choices after that.

Just to give you an idea of how lethargic I was feeling, it took me a good 2-3 hours to get my shit together and walk to the END OF MY BLOCK to the Bedding Experts store that has been there for just over a year now. Luckily, because of the weather, it was a slow day; and the nice guy that worked there was fully available to answer all of my questions. Not to mention he was kinda cute.

I laid on a few Sealys and tried out some Stearns and Fosters before I came across one that fit my price range (a Sealy Posturpedic) and felt oh-so-nice. I also looked at some headboards (since I haven’t had a headboard since I was in high school), and looked at a catalog of bed frames. I found one that I really liked a lot. It’s a platform bed, which means I wouldn’t have to buy a box-spring, and it’s sleek, sexy and just what I was looking for. It looks a little like this, but that one is a Crate & Barrel bed, which would cost me twice as much– or more. Also, the one I want has a walnut finish, which is much more versatile than the chocolate one in the photo.

I purchased the mattress by itself and told the guy I’d give the bed some thought for a little while. After all, I’m getting paid in a few days and I’ve already paid off everything else for the month. So I have a little flow to work with, here.

I took my laundry to the laundromat, because it had to get done. I couldn’t wait another minute. While I was there, I thought everything over and talked about it with my Mom on the cell phone. By the time I got home, I decided I wanted the bed, too– but by then the store was closed. I’ll call him on Monday and make the arrangements.

It felt SO GOOD to do all of this. I have been putting off buying a new, “grown-up” bed for far too long, and today I finally checked another important thing off my list of things to do.

The mattress arrives on Tuesday and the bed will probably take another couple weeks after that. I can’t wait to sleep on it that first night!!!

Yes, shopping therapy IS good for the soul. It’s also going to be very good for the back. 🙂

Hangin' In

Hang in there babyYou remember those posters from the 70s… the ones with the kitten hanging from a tree branch saying “Hang in there baby!” Whether they were some sort of 70s pep talk or just a fad, it seemed everyone had one.

So did I. It didn’t look anything like the image to the left, of course, but it was this monstrous door-sized poster of a kitty that hung on my bedroom door. I think it said “Hang in there baby… Friday’s coming!” if I’m not mistaken. Even at the ripe young age of 9 or 10 I was living for Fridays.

So I’m hanging in there. My depression that I wrote of earlier has subsided for the most part. I’ve just been dealing with so much lately — death, money, school, health, and the usual day-t0-day rituals of life. Things compound and sometimes it feels like there’s no way out. Oddly enough, work is about the only thing in my life lately that is going very well. Everything else has gone to shit in some way, shape or form.

Thankfully I’ve found a way out of most of my problems. Things will get better. I am feeling much more optimistic about that. I just need to “hang in there” a little while longer.

Thank you for all of your comments and your concern. It means a lot to me.

Debbie Downer No More!

I’ve survived another family funeral.  It wasn’t fun… but I’m still here.

Seems all I’ve been doing lately is suviving.  Surviving the heat wave.  Surviving money problems.  Surviving setbacks left and right.

Honestly, lately whenever I talk to people I feel like Debbie Downer.

You know… the character on SNL that can turn any good situation into a bad one with just a few words of sullen sad sap story, punctuated by a trombone hit with every punchline?

Yeah with three deaths in the family in one year, a non-existant lovelife, and a slew of financial setbacks, it’s easy to be the Debbie Downer in any situation.

But dammit… no more.

I’m done with Wah-Wahhhh moments.  I’m done with feeling sorry for myself.  And god knows, I’m done with funerals for a LONG TIME.  There’s only a few weeks left to this summer, and I’m going to do whatever it takes to enjoy them. 

Too bad I have to spend every other weekend in Kenosha getting my mom ready to move. Wah Wahhhh! STOP IT!!!!

OK… maybe I need a vacation… another getaway. 

Yeah but I already cancelled that cruise… seems silly to book another one now.  Wah Wahhhh!  ARRRRGH!

OK OK… fine.  But chorus is starting up again, and it’s looking to be a fun season.  I always like chorus.  It brings my spirits up… and who knows, I could meet a cute new chorus boy to date!

You know what they say about chorus dating… not too good for the soul.  Besides, I haven’t had any good luck dating chorus boys in the last few years– why start now?  Wah Waaahhh!  DAMN YOU, DEBBIE DOWNER!

OK maybe this is going to be harder than I thought… 🙂  But I’m willing to give it a good try.

Yeah well… SHUT UP, BITCH!

Ahhh… I feel better already! 🙂

Wearing my crown

I’ve never been much for head-wear.

Hats have never fit me well. I always look like my overly-round head is being squooshed into the thing. It’s never a pretty sight.

Of course, my head is probably 5 sizes too fat for any normal-sized hat… but that’s probably also just me being (once again) negative about myself.

So the idea of wearing a crown isn’t exactly ideal to me, as you can imagine.

Especially if it’s a crown that goes INSIDE my head, and not ON my head.

Today I was fitted for such a crown… one that will go on top of what’s left of my tooth.

Let me tell you… it is NOT a pleasant experience.

I managed like a trooper though. And my dentist is an ace with that novacane, let me tell you. She knows right where to aim that needle so I don’t feel a doggone thing.

But there’s nothing nastier than the smell of ground-up tooth. And feeling an enormous gap in your mouth where a tooth once resided is very, very strange.

But in the course of an hour and 1/2, I was molded, drilled, ground down, molded again, and fitted with a temporary crown. And then I was on my way.

The temporary crown is made of plastic and has a rough, sandpaper-like feel to it. It feels very strange. It is shaped just like my old tooth. It’s the strangest sensation.

The actual porcelain crown will be ready in about 3 weeks.

But before I can even get the thing ‘installed’… I have to pay for it. And holy fucking hell… is it expensive!

Before insurance, it’s about $950. For a fucking TOOTH made of bathroom sink material.

After insurance, it’s $600. I have great insurance, don’t I?

So now you see why I didn’t go on that big boat ride! Even though I am not quite sure how I’m going to come up with all that money AND pay my rent.

It sucks being poor.

Cruise, Interrupted

Sometimes I get so swept up in making grand plans to do things that I don’t take the time to think rationally about what the end consequences can be.

Case in point: My cruise in January of next year.

When I paid the deposit on the cruise, I had a nice little reserve of cash that would go toward a fun, exciting, and exotic event– unlike any I had ever experienced before. I read all of the brochures, I went to the websites, and got wrapped up in all the excitement. I figured I could make it work.

A month or so later, everything has changed.

Medical bills came in from my recent bout with kidney stones. Dental bills began piling up after my root canal. And in the meantime, my rent fell behind a month while I tried to pay everything and keep my head above water.

Something had to give. So the cruise had to go.

I just hung up with Atlantis, and they are going to refund the $500 deposit I paid back to my debit card.

It’s good to dream big. But sometimes it’s necessary to infuse a little pinch of reality into those dreams, just to make sure they’re the right dreams to have.

The day will come when I can afford a big, luxurious trip on a huge ocean liner. So what if that day isn’t coming this year or next. I can wait.

In the meantime, I look forward to weekend trips and camping excursions. They’re just as much fun, and they don’t wreck the pocketbook nearly as badly.