OK this may be a little bit more information that I’ve divulged as of late, but so what. Here goes.
I need sex. Badly.
I’m an oversized bottle of lube, sitting in the linen closet, collecting dust. I’m condoms that are expiring before your very eyes. I am a porno movie just waiting to be made, but with nobody to star in the damn thing.
I’m oversexed without the sex.
And the sad thing is, as each week passes, I am slowly noticing that my desire for sex is slowly leaving me.
Is that bad? Or is that good?
Does this mean that I am no longer so addicted to sex that I need it 24/7? Or is it really true that after a certain amount of time, one can somehow return to a virginal state?
Yeah OK, it’s not #2. Because hell, once it’s done, it’s done. And believe me, it’s ALL been done. If you know what I mean.
I gotta be honest, the days of having the overwhelming urge to fuck the living shit out of any of-age male figure that moves in front of me has passed me by. Sure, I still spend hours of my free time online, and you can find my mug in any number of Internet-based hook-up or dating sites– usually online– but now, instead of intently cruising the list of screen names to find the perfect bottom to match my top, I let the chats and listings sit while I browse people’s blogs or work on a design project that is probably due in the next 24 hours or so.
And you know what? I don’t mind that one bit.
Before I found blogging, I spent 99% of my online time cruising. And I mean serious, hard-core cruising. And I’ve done some really stupid things in that time. Royally stupid. There were days when I’d have sex with more than one partner. There were days when I’d have sex with more than two. And I didn’t care. It just never bothered me.
Now for some reason it does. Call me picky. Say that I’ve matured. Or that I’ve grown out of that phase of my life. Whatever you want to say, or however you wish to word it, I just don’t feel the need to devote that kind of time to cruising for sex anymore.
So is that good? Yes. I think it’s good. I think I have turned a very important page.
And sure, I can still be found on cruisy sites. But it doesn’t mean I’m doing anything. In fact, given the fact that I haven’t had sex with another person in nearly 3 months– and before that there was a 4 month gap between partners– it’s probably safe to say that I am moving out of that phase. And I have maybe matured somewhat.
I’m going to be 35 years old. I think it’s time for me to start thinking more maturely anyway.
On how I have really wonderful friends
Tonight I drove four of my good friends out to another friend of ours’ family’s home in Glenview, IL for a dinner party. He had actually cooked a lovely dinner for us all, just because we were his friends. (I should note that this particular guy is the aforementioned “Cute New Chorus Guy” I was going on about a few months ago. All that happened back then is water under the bridge and we are now on very friendly terms.) The evening was wonderful, filled with lots of laughter and conversation, wonderful food. and of course, wonderful friends.
So no matter what happens, no matter how lonely I may feel, no matter how horny I may get… the fact that I have wonderful friends like these outweighs all issues, obstacles, and problems I may be having. I’m very, very thankful for that.
On how I could care less about the Oscars¬Æ, yet I will be at a particular Oscar¬Æ Party tomorrow evening, and you should be there too!
Yep, CGMC is hosting their annual Oscar Party tomorrow night. And while I won’t be singing (I must have missed that memo) or anything, I will be in attendance. $40 at the door goes to CGMC and gives you free drinks for a few hours, free food, and free glances at Chicago’s finest men. Oh yeah, it’s at Sidetrack, always a fun place for a party. Starts at 5:00 PM. Be there or be Cher. Or something like that.
On how happy I am that Jay won “Project Runway“
OK I know I am a few days late in talking about this, but if you missed the finale of Bravo’s “Project Runway” you missed one hell of a show. It had everything. Drama, cat-fighting, drama, tears, drama, laughs, drama, fashion, drama, bitchiness and of course… DRAMA. Now don’t get me wrong, I’m no fan of drama in real life, but when it’s on TV, where it belongs, it’s FUN. And my boy Jay won. WOO HOO. He absolutely rocked. I am so proud of my big teddy bear. Now I can’t wait for season two!!
On how I have a new (temporary) gig
Starting today, you will be able to find me guest blogging for Pua while she takes a break to deal with some difficult recent life events.
For those of you who don’t know Pua, she is absolutely one of the warmest, most wonderful people I have ever met– and I haven’t even met her face-to-face yet. Her heart is bigger than the entire Pacific Ocean, and I am honored to have even the tiniest island insde that enormous expanse.
So for a short while, Pua has asked me to sit in for her at “Warm Cookies With a Whiskey Chaser,” her newly-named home. Won’t you stop by and check it out (if you haven’t already,) and while you’re reading what I have to say there, read back and get to know the wonderful person that is Pua. You won’t be disappointed.